A really lousy day

My betrothed and I were on our way to a wedding of a close friend and co-worker this weekend. The happy occasion took place on a boat cruising Lake George in the Adirondak Mountains of New York. The boat sailed at about 4:30. That's about a 4 hour drive from New Haven, totally doable when you leave your house at 10 am right? Well...maybe not.

10:05 - We hit a bizarre traffic jam about 1/2 mile away while I am attempting to reach the local dance boutique in order to purchase Hollywood Fashion Tape for the Bride, who requested in in order to help hold her dress up.

10:10 - The detour leads us know where and I get fed up and head to the highway.

10:15 - Funeral procession halts attempts to turn left.

10:20 - Stop at my sister's house to pick up a black dressy pocket book because I couldn't find mine. Plus I had to go to the bathroom.

10:40 - Stop at the bank to get money. In the parking lot we decide to head the non-direct route in order to visit The Black Swan in Newtown and price fireplace inserts. Plus I still have to get the Hollywood Fashion Tape and the only other place in the area they sell it is 5 minutes from the fireplace store.

11:15 - Black Swan

11:55 - Fashion Tape puchased.

12:00 - Route 84. No problemo. Should be able to make the hotel in Queensbury by 3:30 at the latest.

1:00 - PMS attack and fight with betrothed in car yields mandatory roadside stop, trip to bathroom, McDonald's french fries, and switching of drivers.

2:00 - Albany toll booth. Betrothed notices bad noise that sounds like an oil issue.

2:10 - Dead stop on Rt. 87. Traffic jam at least 5 exits. Map out, we opt for side roads.

2:15 - Pull over at Sunoco station in Schenectedy. Dipstick check. Absolutely NO oil in the car. Betrothed extemely unhappy because his 2002 Hyundai has never leaked a drop of oil but a new engine was recently installed because of some other issue. Car was at dealership for close to two months!

2:30 - Freak thunderstorm (might have been a baby tornado). Huge rain, blowing leaves. Nasty. Schenectedy as far as I could tell, is an armpit.

3:00 - Stuck on back roads trying to circle back to I-87. Stuck behind 18 wheeler doing 35.

3:30 - Pass through Saratoga. Wave to my favorite hotel, the Saratoga Arms.

3:45 - We discuss the possibility of bypassing the hotel and getting changed into wedding finery on the boat. Hotel is at Exit 19, boat at exit 21.

4:00 - Car dies just shy of Exit 18. Engine completely drained of oil.

4:01 - Attempt to call AAA. Verizon will not connect my call because I'm out of area. I almost throw piece of shit phone through windshield. Betrothed stalks off down highway so as not to throw himself in front of oncoming traffic and end the misery.

4:05 - Dial 0 and finally get connected to AAA.

4:30 - I call the bride who, amazingly, answers her own cell phone. Tell her to have a nice time without us.

5:15 - AAA truck finally shows up.

5:30 - Sitting in parking lot of Hyundai dealership waiting for betrothed's niece, a resident of Saratoga but currently in Albany, to come and rescue us.

6:00 - Niece arrives in Murray, a 1991 piece of crap car. I am very happy to see them both.

6:30 - Double rainbow over the Adirondaks. I figure my misery is coming to an end.

7:00 - Albany airport to pick up rent-a-car from only place within 100 miles that has one.

8:00 - Back in Queensbury at Ramada Inn

8:30 - Sitting in a Ramada hofbrau -- German-themed "grill" with a very nice waitress who brings me a double and an owner who offers to lend us her extra car if we need it.

9:00 - Shower

9:30 - Betrothed gives me half of his anti-anxiety pill (true love) kisses me and lets me sleep alone in one of the room's two double beds.

9:35 - I realize my Rush Limbaugh nightmare of a few evenings prior was a walk in the park compared to the day I've just had.

9:40ish - I finally pass out.